My reality check bounced

Little things upset me sometimes. A friend who can’t make it to my birthday. A date I couldn’t keep for paucity of time. A former best friend I try not to keep in touch with but end up calling once in a while. Not often do I let them put me in a bad mood. What’s done is done and what’s gone is gone. But today,  a very small thing makes me very sad.

A friend who I thought I’d never meet is in the city. This friend has grown to be quite close over time and promised to meet me today, but hasn’t called yet. It hurts sometimes when you are all worked up and happy, looking forward to something and it doesn’t happen quite that way. Worse, it probably doesn’t even matter as much to the other person as it does to you.

As a kid, I used to wonder what ‘Great Expectations’ meant. Today I wonder if I’m disillusioned and disappointed only because I expect too much out of life, love, relationships and people. I have more than I could possibly have wished for a few years back. Yet, there is a void. Sometimes, you have everything and yet, you are left wanting. Sometimes you just want things to be different.

Here’s a quote from Chasing Rumi. One of my all time favourites.

“Life is good, Andros,” Georgiou began. “I live in one of the most beautiful cities in the world, I love my work, and we have enough clients. Whenever I have dreamed of setting out on an adventure, my father has given his blessing, and I have gone where I wanted. How is it, then, that I still have a wish, like some yeast fermenting beneath my skin, for something I cannot quite name? However good life appears to be, nothing ever seems to fill this gap.

Sometimes, just sometimes, I wish silly things didn’t make me this sad.


About :P

You don't know me, you can't judge me.
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2 Responses to My reality check bounced

  1. Pixie says:

    I hope you get to meet your friend… sometimes, its necessary to talk things out.. do you think that’s possible?
    Maybe, you could tell your friend how you feel and then you would know whether both of you are on the same page or not.

  2. :P says:

    Aww…thanks for the hugs pixie. Made me feel better. Mischief managed, yes. 🙂

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